Home Tag "Wendy Ellis"

BREAKING: Palestine Mayor Dyes Peacefully At Home

PALESTINE, TX–Palestine Mayor Bob Herrington dyed peacefully at home tonight. The three term mayor said he was tired of the constant ridicule and jokes about his hair from sources such as The Dogwood Tale, David Letterman, The Daily Show and others about his hair, but could not bring himself to actually get a haircut. “I […]

Palestine’s downtown business owners vote to eject new downtown club that caters to blacks

After Success of Palestine’s ‘Movie in the Park’ Comes ‘XXX Movie in the Park’

PALESTINE, TX–The City of Palestine will sponsor an adult film in the park, similar to the family oriented Movie in the Park held recently. In a press release from Laura Westgate, Communications Manager for the City of Palestine, this will be a double feature event. “First, we’ll have Riley Steele in Love Fool, an adult film […]

Palestine’s downtown business owners vote to eject new downtown club that caters to blacks

Palestine City Manager: ‘Elkhart May Have Chemical Weapons’

PALESTINE, TX–”The City of Elkhart may have chemical weapons,” Palestine City Manager Wendy Ellis warned the Palestine City Council during the second emergency meeting of the week as she makes her case for a wall blocking Elkhart residences from entering the City of Palestine and suggests war with the smaller neighbor may be the only […]

Palestine’s downtown business owners vote to eject new downtown club that caters to blacks

Palestine City Manager: ‘It’s Time to Secure Border with Elkhart’

“When Elkhart sends its people, they’re not sending their best.  They’re sending people that have lots of problems, and they’re bringing those problems with them.  They’re bringing outside influence, rapists and drug dealers.   Some, I assume are good people, but I haven’t met one yet.” PALESTINE, TX–Clad in camouflage and declaring herself in ‘Wendy […]

Palestine’s downtown business owners vote to eject new downtown club that caters to blacks

Palestine City Manager Announces ‘Walking Dead’ Plan for Zombie Apocalypse

PALESTINE, TX–The City of Palestine will be prepared in the event that the dead rise from their graves to feed on the living, according to an announcement by City Manager Wendy Ellis. “I had fired the former emergency management coordinator for not having a plan like this in place, and, if you want it done […]

Palestine’s downtown business owners vote to eject new downtown club that caters to blacks