Home Anderson County Elkhart Claims Successful Test of Nuclear Weapon; Palestine on Edge
Elkhart Claims Successful Test of Nuclear Weapon; Palestine on Edge

Elkhart Claims Successful Test of Nuclear Weapon; Palestine on Edge

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ELKHART, TX—Anderson County residents were startled by the news on Thursday that Elkhart, Palestine’s fiercest rival and southern neighbor, announced they had successfully tested a nuclear weapon.  This was according to Elkhart’s mayor.

Palestine has been on the brink of war with Elkhart over the past year, but this most recent provocation by Elkhart may force Palestine to act and an emergency meeting of the Palestine City Council is scheduled for Friday night to discuss the issue.  The police department has been placed on high alert by Mayor Bob Herrington in anticipation of a possible attack by the Elkhart army.

“Palestine will not accept Elkhart as a nuclear power,” Palestine Mayor Bob Herrington said.  “Palestine has been a nuclear power ourselves, for years, and even with our expertise in handling the radioactive materials we had a horrible accident in 2013 from, which, we’re still recovering.”

Herrington is of course referring to a mishandled nuclear test with radioactive contamination that resulted in Wendy Ellis growing from a half eaten bear claw pastry to a monster that eventually became the city manager.

“Once council has the opportunity to evaluate the situation in Elkhart, we’ll know how to act.  At this time, we have no way of confirming if Elkhart has actually tested a nuclear weapon or not or if they have missiles capable of reaching Palestine,” Herrington said.

The City of Palestine urges caution, but encourages citizens to continue with their day to day activities.

“It’s important that we not let this enemy on our southern border change our way of life.”

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Comment(34)

  1. Hilarious lol! Property values gonna take a major hit I suppose. If you are planning to Sell and evacuate the area, visit my wife’s website link, she’s a local Realtor. 🙂

  2. I’m not waiting on the council. I’m headed out to shoot me some folks right now. Dang terrorists aren’t gonna get my city.

  3. So since city employees can’t defend themselves. Your a jerk and stalk city employees. Get life and a real job. I’m going to do my best to start a hate group for your page.

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